Korean golfer sensation!!

The results are now in from our poll on what you like least about Jakarta and there are clear lessons in them about the issues that we need to address upfront and often. These “sensing” exercises will continue to the a feature of life on your favourite organ given it is our sole means of communicating with readers at the moment as, with the sole exception of the guy looking for the phone number or e-mail of a Top Gun pole dancer, readers comments have thus far been rather scratchy. Go on, we dare you, write something for fuck’s sake, doesn’t have to be funny, on topic or even grammatical; we just want to hear from you.

Anyway, back to the poll where, it hardly goes without saying, that Jakarta’s “macet” was right up there at number 1, perhaps more surprising is that right up there with it was your Korean Golfer!!  This appears to confirm two things, firstly that we have a significant golfer demographic and secondly that I am not alone in my frustration at the length of time a Korean foursome can spend on the green; it’s little wonder the fuckers carry those tiny director chairs around with them as their fifteenth club. It also means that our nascent plans for a Korean language version of NOT the Jakarta Post are now nestling at the bottom of the office WPB, no worries however as Google was unable to come up with a convincing translation for fuck anyway.

In third place and in a clear demonstration of our readership’s acute social responsibility, is corruption, the wart on the otherwise generally handsome face of Indonesia. Whether this concern arises from the endless and brazen shenanigans of the elite or more personal “issues” with Immigrasi over your last visa is not clear, however, rest assured that this is a subject to which I suspect we will be returning often. Thanks to all who took part.

Last evening, our inrepid Blok-M stringer was to take full advantage of his generous bar allowance and covered the entire length of Felatehan in his endless quest for all the news unfit to print. He reports an exciting night in the final matches of the FAB league Group Stage with many close games and also a 16-0 for heaven’s sake. Bad luck D’s Raiders, bring more players next time.

Some happy Trojan Bastards in a photo that is shite even by the low standards of our stringer

In a vital game at MyBar, the Rajputs held an 8-6 advantage going into the last match against Trojan Bastards, only to be pegged back to 8-8 by rampant Saffa, Mark Sims – and then went on lose the three points in a decider as Iwan and Barry Mason needed only a couple of breaks to clear the table in fine fashion.

In his peregrinations, our stringer also came across Alex McLeish, still celebrating his get out of jail free card, when he reported that the Polis (interesting that the Scots pronounce it nearly the way the Indonesians spell it) had confiscated his entire stock of TaylorMade ™ R11s and a dozen Scotty Cameron putters. He had explained that he was having putting problems and was trying them out one by one, however, as they were all in their original wrapping Pak Polisi had told him this was “bohong”. Alex is not best pleased, as they say, and awaits his day in court.

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About Not the Jakarta Post

Seeker after untruths, generally finding 'em
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